We were brainstorming ideas for this title, but I decided that instead of making something catchy up, I should just f***ing swear. After all, what separates Brainsturbator from all those other weird science sites is 1) my cheerful willingness to be offensive and immature, 2) my total contempt for copyright laws and common sense, and 3) my voracious consumption of psychedelic drugs.  There’s no sense in pretending we’re some sort of respectable operation when I give out awards.  Hell, odds are a few of these sites would rather not be associated with me.

This is a collection of what I consider to be some of the best websites on the internets.  I spend a truly unhealthy amount of time on the internets, so I appreciate finding someone who’s put in work and built a quality resource.  This is in no particular order and not all of it will be interesting to you: I tend to have a much wider Curiosity Zone than most people I talk to.  A number of these websites are truly amazing and completely obscure, because the people who run them don’t want to deal with Search Engine Optimization, Web 2.0, keywords, or any of the other obligatory bullshit of “blog” culture.  And that’s a beautiful thing. Here’s a toast to Fucking Art—let’s begin:

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I realize I might be alone on this one, but 2008 has already started for me.  The last time Brainsturbator was cranking, I was writing about time: the concept of the Chronon, a series on Chronobiology, and a meditation on synchronicity.  Appropriately enough, in the past month my perception of time has changed radically.  A single day can take me up to a week.  I just spent 8 hours in a vocal booth that felt like a 20 minute workout routine.  Weirder still, I find myself experiencing moments from the short-term future in advance lately.  I will explain this (to some extent) later on.

Most of what I write about myself is a self-depreciating joke.  However, most of the emails I write these days are an explanation of Who I Am and What I Do, and I can’t keep rephrasing the same content.  I do love you all, but I want to love you all efficiently and effectively. In the past I have used many names and many outlets, and the challenge for 2008 is clearly going to be integrating everything back into, like....a single human being.

Brainsturbator has covered South American torture camps, the fractal Universe, and the UFO phenomenon, yet the most difficult article I’ve written turns out to be a simple accounting of my own life.  Allow me to reintroduce myself.

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When you come across someone who is going to change your life, you know it immediately.  Looking over my life in retrospect, I think that’s been nearly 100% true.  You never know how, why or when, but that basic super-electric charge is there the second the connection is made.  I’ve been learning many things from many people, here on these internets, but I owe more to Ben Mack than pretty much anyone else I can think of.  I am writing this as a thank you to Ben, and as a heads-up to you, the reader.

There are serious problems in the world today and I have no interest in complaining about them. Whatsoever, yo. I expect my friends to slap me as hard as they can when I start backsliding like that.  Because when I find myself asking “Why?” at this point, I’m just lying to myself.  I know exactly why, I know exactly how to change it, and neither answer is comforting. How do we break the cultural hypnosis?  How do we expect to get people to wake up and change their own lives?  I’m bringing this up here because I believe that Ben Mack has a great deal to teach about mass media, about persuasion and the creation of consensus reality, and most of all about realistic solutions to these problems.

Interested? 

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Brainsturbator has been up and running for over a year now, which amazes me.  I can’t tell if I think it’s been 5 years, or just a few months, but doing this site has been the most educational and valuable experience I’ve had in awhile.  I’m very grateful to everyone who provided feedback, corrected my endless mistakes, and helped build this into the monster it is now.  To celebrate, we’ve sat down with our tracking software—which I highly recommend, we use Shaun Inman’s program Mint and it’s the best analytics software I’ve ever seen—to compile something unique. 

I’m including 4 of my personal favorite articles, but everything else here is based on your favorite articles.  According to Mint, these are the most popular, most linked-to, most talked-about articles I’ve done.  A number of articles I spent an excessive amount of time on flopped completely—and several articles I put minimal effort into have gone on to be hugely successful.  Someday it will all make sense, right?  Probably not...but in the meantime, I love each and every one of you, and I hope Brainsturbator will continue to be useful in 2008.

--thirtyseven

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Awhile back, Nick Pell from Key 64 asked me to write an article for him, on the topic of “Ten Ways YOU Can Fight Fascist America.” After I got that done—and you can read it here—Nick generously offered to return the favor.  So I’ve asked him to write something for all of Brainsturbator’s younger readers.  I asked him to lay out a plan: “How to Destroy Your High School in Seven Days.”

I didn’t know if I’d get a magick ritual or a treatise on home explosives, but Nick surprised me and came with a truly interesting angle.  His recipe is something anyone can apply—in fact, our sick culture will do most of the work for you. He’s also got the personal experience to prove that it works.  I’m very happy to offer this, and since Nick has a lot to teach, I will now get out of the way.  Enjoy.

--thirtyseven

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I was going to do a “We Salute You” tribute, but I realized an interview would be better.  Besides, I’m honestly unsure about how to approach even an introduction to Godforbid.  Do I say he’s one of my favorite rappers?  After all, the dude has moved on from mere hip hop—he’s currently working with That Handsome Devil, making some of the most creative shit I’ve heard since Zappa was wearing tight pants and frowning at the audience. 

Shit...there I go, making music critic comparisons. Here’s the bottom line: this interview is some of the best stuff Brainsturbator has done in 2007.  That Handsome Devil is an amazing band, and I feel confident saying that checking out their music will radically improve your day.  Godforbid is a singular human being, and you’re about to find out why directly from him.

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We talk about the third dimension a lot, but most humans don’t live in it.  Abbot’s Flatland was not so much a metaphor as an operational description of the sensory world most people inhabit: a continuous, unbroken plane that, despite surface variations and wrinkles, remains a flat stage for our two dimensional lives.  This is inevitable, since humans cannot hover or fly without technology assistance, and few of us can jump higher than three feet off the ground. 

And let’s be serious, here—what is a dimension? Have anyone ever even proved they existed?  Sure, you can draw a Cartesian XYZ grid on paper, but you can also draw a unicorn vomiting angels. I’ve been digging through the concept of time for a month, and it’s a concept nobody can really define, despite the fact we all experience it.  I’ve come to realize there’s very little humans can say for sure about space, either.  The more we learn, the less we know.  Everything you were taught in school is currently falling apart—so let’s take a look at a theory that will likely be replacing all this Big Bang horseshit: the Universe is fractal and infinite at every level of scale.

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“The good Christian should beware of mathematicians and all those who make empty prophecies. The danger already exists that mathematicians have made a covenant with the devil to darken the spirit and confine man in the bonds of Hell.”

--St. Augustine

I’ve been working on an article encompassing these themes, but I had a revelation.  If all I’m doing is re-organizing and synthesizing the work of other humans, why do I write so much?  Rather than burden you with my own meditations on “The Illusion of Control,” I’ve decided to abandon that illusion altogether for this piece.  I’m going to keep going for three more sentences and then I will step out of the way completely.

Everything assembled here is brainfood with a purpose: triggering shifts in perspective.  When you get used to the same perspective—or “stuck”—it can be alarming to feel yourself shifting, but that’s a good thing—that’s neurons waking up, that’s muscle tissue saying THANK YOU, that’s new hormone combinations in your bloodstream.  After all, even if your conscious “self” actually was in control, you’re only driving the car—you’re only manipulating something else.

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When I started Brainsturbator, I still had a lot to learn about good web content.  Most of the early material in the archives is pretty weak, and I’m gradually fixing that.  The UFO Library probably needed an update the most, because there’s not enough good information online. What I mean is, it’s very difficult to find data about UFOs, but it’s very easy to find theories about what they are.  I’m much more interested in getting people to ask their own questions, than in summarizing my opinion about what the important questions are. 

Just the same, this libary is shaped by my own biases. I see the UFO phenomenon as fundamentally unexplained, and probably involving multiple causes that human science in 2007 cannot explain or predict.  This phenomenon is real, global, weird and important.  This library is my humble effort at making it a little easier to answer your own questions.  Enjoy.

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